Wednesday, May 26, 2010

New year new Beginnings

“From small beginnings come great things.”

Proverb quotes

New Year, new beginnings

The dawn waits
Blushing scarlet before she steps
Scarlet skirts spilling
Over cool blue mountain crests
Breathless she arrives
Slipping in your window
Your face awash with light and life…
Love wells up in a rush
Spilling from my eyes
Shh…they’re happy tears…

Just yesterday, or maybe the day before
I cupped that fuzzy head of yours
In the palm of one hand
As that first drooly smile bubbled up
And I lost my mind for you…
Now you’re grown
Dreaming of your own
That doe eyed Jewish girl
So high, can you see the curve of the earth
Reflected in her eyes
Does she make your heart race, child?
I’ll hold that first smile for you
Give her the rest but this one is mine…
Its just too much
Hush…these happy tears…

Never thought I could love like I love you
Like Diana I got an heir and a spare
Your banshee brother
The terminus of endless screaming nights
How far away they are
Hair like a lion,
Skinny jeans and a fedora,
You’ve never been mine
Oh God, these ragged tears…
I lost my heart on you
An addict craving your arms around me
Without asking
I can’t get enough
The pretty girls, they smile shy
When you aren’t looking
You’ll break their hearts
But this ache is mine.

You stir in your sleep
As I whisper these prayers
Your lives on the wing
Send you off into your future
Don’t wake them yet, these happy tears…
Give them your best
But this moment…is mine.
TL Boehm

© 2010

Wow. That one got me....the husband is in the kitchen, slicing onions...perhaps I could still mask my inane bawling if I went out there and commandeered the knife. Or not.

This morning I rose in time to see this amazing scarlet sky in the east, framed by my boys bedroom window. Suffice it to say, they're still kinda cute when they're asleep. I kept that image when I dropped by SP (poetry group) to check out the challenge...and as I sat here, I don't know. I guess its maternal hormones. Family dynamics have always intrigued me. And I have always known that my time with my boy kids is limited. If I am successful as a parent - they will reach that point of independence. I can't be Britain and gun for them...I will have to let go. And it will suck...

On a lighter note. I'm back at Examiner again after a self imposed if you want to read some "Christian" here - otherwise...peace.

Go hug 'em if you got em.

Friday, January 1, 2010

Ascendency 2010

I have been a victim
Spattered by the saline spray
Of tears
Breakers crashing
The roaring surf
Blood in my ears rushing
Unable to fill the chasm
When dreams hit reality
Frail hope shatters
Scattered like gulls in the wake
Of a squall line
That dichotomy of sand and sky
Boundaries blur
Jetties endure the burden
Of the coming storm
This relentless tide hammers fragile shores
Limited ability to absorb the fallout
I find myself washed out to sea
Carried away
Forever swimming parallel to safety
Facetious hope a contagion
So acceptable to take on water
The annealing of complacency and stubborn faith
Simply a tonic for fools
I will be a victim
No more
My eyes are dry
I am weathered but unbroken
No more dredging the bottom for broken bones
And abandoned dreams
My reality waits
For me to stop treading turbulent water
And simply ascend
TL Boehm
© 2010

OH YES! So lets just cut to the chase, shall we? The poem above isn't the greatest but I promised Sharon I was going to make it my first post of the year...and so there it is. Thank you, Sassy. You are a constant inspiration.

And now for the first randomized blog of the decade...

I got home last night a tad early. The boys were out shopping for movies and I found myself with time to burn. So I added 25 songs to my project playlist, had a couple of beers, and the last cry of the year. Sometimes, when we drop out of hyperspace, we are met by our grief, our regret, our loss and we simply have to deal with it until we can jump again. I will always miss my dad. I will always open Christmas cards from friends and see them a little older, and I must come to terms with it. But I don't have to be tormented.

So I am done with mourning over all I lost in 2009. I am purposed. Focused. I am loaded for bear. I won't list the resolutions. I'll just put 'em all into action and see if anyone notices.

Today, I am celebrating with my family. The slipper clad, tie dyed shirt sportin' man is grillin' cow parts, the boys are poning each other on the XBox, the cat hasn't dropped a kitteh suhpryz on anything, I have a cold beer and a keyboard...Oh yeah. Life is good.

For those of you who put up with me this past year, I cannot articulate how much I appreciate you. Thank you for weathering the storm. Thank you for speaking light into my life. You have no idea how much you mean to me.

Yes, I'll be cloggin up the bandwidth with bad poetry and Jesuscheez and all kinds of stuff this next year. Its who I am. Its what I do. But one thing will definitely change and that is, I will be spending time on YOUR page too.

Peace and blessings for 2010! (Its gonna be an AMAZING year)